Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Sticky Situation 3

One of the worst things about having a lap band is that fact that food (and even drinks sometimes) can get stuck. Once the food is stuck in the band and won't go down, it only has one way to get out-- it needs to come back up. Depending on how tight your lap band is, this can happen daily... or not at all. My band is not very tight and pretty much the only time this happens to me is when I am out because I get anxious and the band tightens up and food just will not go down. 

So I am normally very careful when I eat in public, but occasionally I am not careful enough and mistakes happen. I recently made one of those mistakes... with very embarrassing consequences.

I went to the footy on Sunday because AJ is a massive Tigers supporter and we were excited to see them play in their first final in 12 years. So were the other 95,000 other people at the stadium. The game didn't start until 3.20 pm and I hadn't had a chance to eat anything all day because I had rushed from my mum's house back to Melbourne and then caught a train to the MCG in time for the game. I was starving and there were not a lot of band-friendly food choices to make.

I am obviously an idiot and I decided to get myself a meat pie and a cider because it's the footy and that is what you do! Then disaster struck and I felt the pie get stuck in my band. I let it sit for a while and hoped it would go down. Then I stood up at the back of the seats bay for a while trying to jiggle it down. Then I took a tinsy tiny sip of cider because sometimes that can lubricate it down the band. Nope, nothing would work.

Next thing I get a familiar feeling that means that food is coming out of the band RIGHT NOW. I raced to the toilets and was faced with a large queue (did I mention there were 95,000 people there?). It was too late... it already came up. I didn't even have time to get to the sinks or the bin and so I vomited in my own mouth. Everyone in the queue saw me do it and they all collectively jumped away from me. I just stood there, completely panic stricken for what felt like 5 minutes, but was probably 5 seconds. Then a lovely girl grabbed me and pushed me to the front and shoved me in the next available cubical.

I tried to stay in the cubical for as long as possible so that by the time I came out no one from the queue would still be in there. Of course I timed it perfectly so that the lovely girl who helped me was standing at the sinks when I came out. I thanked her, she told me I toilet paper stuck to my shoe, and I just wanted the world to swallow me up.

After that incident... and the performance by the Tigers, I was in need of many more ciders to ease the pain. Luckily I managed to find the vomiting incident more and more funny by the end of the night... but not any less disgusting!

Tuesday, September 03, 2013

Sugar Detox

This week I have tentatively moved back to my apartment and gone back to work full time because my mum has got some strength back now that she has finished chemo. Unfortunately her health could go downhill any day so I am trying to make the most of her good days and get some work done and enjoy being home. The routine of normal life will be a huge help in regaining my health and fitness. I am just a mess when I am out of routine. Who knew that grocery shopping, cooking meals, going to work and being at home could feel so amazing!

It seems that the rude shock I got from the scales last week has given me the push I needed to try and get my health back on track. I am no longer in denial that my weight 'isn't that bad' and ready to do the work to lose the weight. I am really trying not to be too hard on myself for the massive gain over the past 6 months year... but that is much easier said than done!

While I was looking after my mum for the past few months I managed to get myself seriously addicted to sugar again. My mum had no appetite at all during chemo so I had the house full of high calorie treats to try and entice her to eat something... instead she lost 20 kilos and I gained 20 kilos!Almost ever single evening I would binge eat on sugars because I felt like I deserved it or even needed it because I was so stressed out or had a bad day or I was lonely or whatever excuse I came up with that day.

I knew I needed to have a bit of a sugar detox so I have completely eliminated sugar from my diet so my body can stop the intense cravings. My body is in serious hurt from this withdrawal and just wants to sleep and my legs feel like concrete. Does this exhaustion wear off eventually? I feel like a zombie right now... a very bitchy zombie who wants to eat chocolate!

I can't type anymore... too tired from lack of suagr...