Yesterday was weigh day for me and I was very pleased to register a 400 gram loss on the scale, which is just under 1 lb. This brings me down to 101.8 kilos which is about 224 lbs. It was TTOM for me this week and I was quite sick with bad cramps so I didn't exercise very much and I caved in to a few sweet cravings, so a loss is great news for me.
I find it slightly unbelievable that I am so close to getting under 100 kilos. For the past few years I have held that up as my ultimate goal and I thought that I would feel different now that I am so close. As much as I want to get under 100 kilos, I am already thinking about my next goal which is 90 kilos. For a long time when my weight was so high (128.5 kilos) I really couldn't think beyond 100 kilos, but now I can see that I can go further then that.
I think the big reason that I am not so excited about reaching 100 kilos is because numbers on the scale are not my biggest focus anymore. Instead I am aiming to be consistent with my eating and exercise. I want this time to be different so the question I continually ask myself is can I sustain this behaviour for the rest of my life?
I know that I could lose 30 kilos in a few months by exercising for 2 hours a day and barely eating anything- I have done this numerous times and each time I have regained the weight (and more) because this is not sustainable behaviour. So this time I have been 'dieting' but I have not once felt like I am missing out on anything.
I have gone out with friends for drinks, had dinners out and even the occasional take away, but I have factored this into my calories for the day. Sometimes I go over my calories, but I figure that is just life and I can't stick to 1200 calories every day for the rest of my life. I know that if I deprive myself of too much that I will end up binging. With this in mind I make sure I cook foods I enjoy, my diet regularly includes burritos, pizza, butter chicken, spaghetti, red curry, chocolate pudding and ice cream. Obviously these are all low calorie versions, but they taste awesome and they easily fit within my calories for the day.
The hardest thing for me to do so far is learn that I can indulge in small quantities and it is ok. The first few weeks were extremely hard and I felt like slipping back into my 'all or nothing' mentality and binging all day just because I ate 2 small chocolates. Now I feel comfortable eating treats and not punishing myself for it or sabotaging my diet. Last week I had huge chocolate cravings, so I bought a box of my favourite chocolates and I ate 1/4 of the box until I felt satisfied and then I put them away for when I next feel like indulging. Even little things like yesterday I ate 2 chocolate bullets at work, but I don't feel like that means I should give up and eat the whole packet anymore.
I exercise as much as I can, but if I am busy or sick I don't put pressure on myself to do it because otherwise I will get burnt out and give up. I still don't really enjoy exercise very much so I try to be more active in my every day life and do exercise that I enjoy such as swimming and weight training. I know that I should do more cardio, so I try to get on the treadmill while my favourite shows are on or do a quick exercise DVD.
I no longer feel like my eating and exercise need to be perfect for me to successfully lose weight and be healthy. I know that perfection is not sustainable so instead I aim to make healthy choices when I can that still enable me to live the life that I want to live.
Yaaaaaaaaay! You have no idea how proud I was reading this post, reading your acknowledgement that you're listening to your body, understanding that it's okay to have a couple of chocolates here and there - and that it doesn't signal 'the end'. All of those little milestones that you mentioned are so incredibly awesome. You're totally in reach of double digits. :-D
ReplyDeleteIt is uncanny how you always seem to post exactly what I am feeling at the exact same time....unfortunately unlike you I have been so successful with my efforts so you are a huge inspiration to me. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteSound like you got the right idea and have the recipe for success that's for sure.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I get to this point, of knowing how to eat a bit of treats and lose and then when I hit a rough patch in life I swing back to the emotional eating and no exercise. Aiiii. It's getting old and I need to get a handle on it for life and quit beating myself up about it.
Hope you have a good weekend!
sounds like you've really hit a groove, well done!
ReplyDeletecongratulations on the loss! And good job with the food and exercise. It can be hard to think realistically when it comes to those things, I think. I know I have trouble with the "all or nothing" mentality. So good job.
ReplyDeleteNow I'm just left to wonder whether I'm just wanting chocolate because you mentioned it, or because I actually want chocolate :D
Totally agree with your post, I think it is best to do things at a pace that suits your lifestyle and is sustainable. I like you, go out and drink and have days where I am not so good, but I am pretty good most of the time, kind of like the 80 / 20 rule. And your still losing which is awesome!!
ReplyDeleteThat was a great post, Tully!! I am trying my best to stop focusing on the numbers too.... It is hard when all you know is scale obssession!
ReplyDeleteCongrats on the loss too!!!
You are so close to cracking that 100 barrier! Go girl!
ReplyDeleteThis is a really healthy attitude to losing. Having your ake and eating it too really.