I had a conversation with a good friend the other day about my end goals for weight loss. She has been a big inspiration to me by losing almost 70 kilos (154 lbs) and having plastic surgery to completely remodel her body after weight loss. She has recently gained about 25 kilos back after having a baby and adjusting to a new life, but she still looks fabulous and doesn’t look to me like she needs to lose weight. Unfortunately she has been completely miserable about the weight gain and she is really struggling to be happy at a heavier weight (which I completely understand).
I told my friend that if I could maintain 75 kilos (165 lbs) I would be happy to have plastic surgery to have my excess skin removed and live comfortably in the mid-to-low 70’s range. I know I wouldn’t be considered a healthy BMI at this weight and I wouldn’t have the perfect body, but I would be happy at that weight. I feel fit and healthy so I think it is more important that I get on with my life and stop obsessing about weight loss. It is just ridiculous to me that I let a few kilos get in the way of my happiness and I don’t want to live like that anymore.
When I told my friend this I could see that she really couldn’t see where I was coming from. She even told me that if I got my plastic surgery done at 75 kilos I would still be unhappy with my body and I would focus on my love handles or some other part of me to hate. She does have experience in this because she had her first lot of plastic surgery at this weight, she still wasn’t happy, so she lost more weight and got more surgery done.
I probably felt the same way as her about 6 months or a year ago, but my focus has really changed lately. I care less about the way I look and more about my health. I have to admit that as much as I used to think I was doing this for my health, my main motivation was really just vanity… Don’t get me wrong, I am still as vain as the next person, but my appearance is no longer a priority for me in losing weight, it’s more about being happy and healthy.
I don’t want to be patronising and say I felt sorry for my friend, but I did feel for her because I have been in the same place. More than anything it highlighted how much I don’t want to be stuck in the cycle of dieting and hating my body forever. I just feel like there is so much more to life than having the perfect body and, the more I focus on my weight and my body, the less interesting I am as a person. I am so grateful to be starting my 30’s with the new perspective on life.