I should have remembered that I am still sore and swollen from body lift surgery and that I selected the cheapest carpet option for the house, so I was essentially sleeping on a concrete slab. Not only have I been in a world of pain since then, I have been super swollen. You should see the marks my knickers are leaving on me from digging into my swollen hips and back.
|My 'bed' on the floor|
The first thing I tried was a 3 day juice cleanse. I had read that increasing fluids and fruits and vegetables could help the process and I figured it might also help shift a bit of post-Christmas weight too. There was one particular juice cleanse that I had seen positively reviewed on a few Australian blogs last year so I thought I would give it a try-- even though it was very expensive.
Oh my god, big lesson learnt, do not always trust reviews from people who are paid to give them. Not only were the juices revolting, but I was S-T-A-R-V-I-N-G! This is coming from someone who has survived 8 weeks on optifast shakes.
I only lasted through to dinner time on the first day and then I gave up and the rest of the juices went in the bin. Not only were the juices a big waste of money, they also screwed me around big time. I had to leave work at 3.00 pm for my scheduled delivery time of 4.00 - 6.00 pm. After numerous phonecalls the juices were finally delivered at 11.45 pm. So I had to leave work early for no reason, wait around the house almost 6 hours and then stay up till late (on a work night) to get these stupid things. Not a great experience!
|This was the first one I tried, cos lettuce and avocado, or something disgusting like that!|
I had much higher hopes for my next attempt at reducing my swelling because it all sounded very scientific. I purchased one of those Groupon like email deals that go around for lymphatic activation that promised the following:
Your first hour-long session, combined with a second 45-minute treatment, will activate your lymphatic system (a small network of vessels and nodes) to stimulate circulation, detoxify the body and release fluid. Using three revolutionary machines, the treatments assist with weight loss, provide pain and stress relief and ensure you get a fantastic night's sleep.
I like to think of myself as open minded, but this treatment seemed to be a lot of hocus pocus. First the guy gave me a presentation on how jumping on a special little trampoline every day can cure cancer and actually cured a baby who was brain dead. Funnily enough, I could buy one from him for hundreds of dollars...
Next up he measured my energy on what I can only describe as a lightsaber, that he was then able to tell me how he could sell me supplements to help me with whatever was wrong with my energy (I can't remember what he said was wrong with me anymore).
|Me with the 'lightsaber'|
Finally, I was put inside a SOQI bed for half an hour that was supposed to assist with lymphatic activation. It was actually quite relaxing laying on the bed under the heat lamps with my legs being vibrated. I have doubts that it did anything for me because I didn't feel any different, but maybe if I took all those supplements, jumped on the little trampoline, and purchased the 10 week course of treatments that the guy recommended it would work... or maybe not.
|The SOQI bed|