Friday, October 24, 2008

Playing Dress Ups

So these days Australia is getting all American and celebrating Halloween, which sounds like fun because I mean who doesn't like eating lollies and chocolate?! Well my little brother's Canadian girlfriend (who lives in Australia) started a tradition a few years back of throwing big Halloween parties. Every year I cringe and think 'what the fuck am I going to wear?'. Being a sexy kitten isn't exactly cute when you weigh over 100 kilos.

The first year I told my brother's girlfriend that I would just come and help set up but not stay for the party. Of course I ended up getting smashed (because hanging up decorations is thirsty work). So I painted my face green (using her green body paint because she was a ninja turtle) and wore a witches hat and called that a costume.

Last year I just avoided it all together. I may try to avoid it again but she is coming over to my place this Sunday to cook us all a belated Canadian Thanksgiving feast (she sure likes to be festive...) so if she pushes me to go I am going to have to come up with something. Her and her 3 (skinny) girlfriends are all wearing some lycra super hero costumes, thanks god she didn't try to include me in that. It is not an option to be a piker and not dress up because these people take dressing up seriously.

I considered just going with it and poking fun at my fat and dressing up as a contestant from the biggest loser. Or, I have this outfit I wear that consists of a tight black singlet top and tight black leggings- I then put on a loose wrap dress over the top so it looks quite nice in the end. Before I put the wrap dress on I always look at myself in the mirror and laugh because I look like an obese brunette version of Olivia Newton-John in that final scene in Grease! The problem is that I won't know 95% of the crowd and they are all cool, young hipsters and it might just look more tragic then funny.

This isn't my first dilemma with costumes, I couldn't count the number of parties I have avoided or given lame excuses for not dressing up (I came straight from work, I am going to another party after, I had to catch public transport...) because I am embarrassed to dress up. I can still remember when I was 10 we had to dress up as our favourite fairy tale character at school and I went as Gretel from Hansel and Gretel. Only one other girl in school dressed up as Gretel and she was the tallest and skinniest girl at school and everyone laughed because there was a 'fat Gretel' and a 'skinny Gretel'. Not only that, but just to rub salt in the wound, 'skinny Gretel' won the best costume competition even though my costume was better then hers, she just looked cuter in it. So now have this paranoia of looking like the 'fat version' of something or someone.

So what is a fat girl to dress up as for Halloween? What have you dressed up as in the past (bonus points for photos!)?


  1. I'm going as Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz this year. Last year I went as a pirate, as it means a long skirt, a top, some scarves and a pirate hat, so you can be covered and still fit in. I got suprised yesterday with the fact that wer have to have costumes for the halloween parade wer're doing through the advance mall with the internation pre-schoolers, so I went to the dollar store and got a cowboy hat, two toy guns, and a hakercheif to tie around my neck like a scarf bandanna. I'll wear it with jeans and my brown coat and that wil be my cowgirl costume. It's not great, but it's cheap and easy on short notice, and again, something I can be reasonably comfortable in.

  2. A pirate wench is a great idea and if any skinny chicks turn up dressed the same they will look dumb cos who every heard of a skinny pirate wench. You're got to be curvy!

  3. Oh man, a sackboy costume would be awesome. It's a character from a new PS3 game, LittleBigPlanet.

    What about Sarah Palin?

    If you like making stuff, you could go as a Wii controller. Maybe a sushi roll? What about going as your favourite blogger... Marshmallow? :D Get a fake moustache and go as Mario?

    Oh I know! Get an afro wig, some fake tanner, a white shirt, tie, and black pants, and go as Jonah Takalua from Summer Heights High :D

  4. I suppose at least you know that they are all actually getting dressed up. That they do take the costumes seriously.

    I've always avoided costume parties because I'm always worried it's some kind of joke and I'll be the only one dressed up

    OR I'll be over or under dressed in comparison to everyone else

    Or because like you I can't pull off the sexy nurse or superhero or sex kitten etc

    It's a tough one hun!

  5. Weren't you in Paris? Go as a French Girl - not French Maid!

    Take your black dress, wear a scarf and a barrett, red lipstick, high heels. Bring a baguette! Drink red wine!

    Pirate is also good, easy to do. Do you have to go as someone specific? Go as an 80's girl!
    Get inspiration here:

  6. Princess Fiona from Shrek. As an ogre, of course. That's when she's at her best :)

  7. You know what would look STUNNING? A tavern wench. You HAVE to be curvy and have a gorgeous rack for it (which you have). And they have a corset type thingee to accentuate the waist - v feminine

    Me? I'm going as a naughty schoolgirl this year. One whose afterschool job is a domme.


    Anyway here is what I am thinking for you....

  8. My gosh I feel like I wrote the post myself. I've been terrified since childhood to dress up for fear of being laughed at. Anyways since entering my adulthood I have avoided it like it's the plague, but when I did dress up I went as the following:
    cat - I painted my face, put on headband ears, and wore grey and black...and I didn't feel sexy in the slightest way.
    pippy longstalking - got a striped long sleeve shirt, jean jumper, knee high mismatched socks, braided my then reddish hair with wire in it so they would stand out, and I had one of those monkeys with the velcro on the hands that I rapped around my neck and it sat on my shoulder.
    This year I'm going as a corpse prom queen. I'm wearing a black bridesmaid dress I have (providing it fits still), and will go hog wild with the hair and makeup. My husband is going as the corpse queen.

  9. Take a box of cereal and put a knife through it and say you're a cereal killer :)

    It's a fat friendly costume I always have on standby!

  10. No ideas here - have to say i'm much like you in that I avoid dressing up wherever possible! Curious to see what you decide though.

  11. Awww honey! I feel for you. I think dressing up as a Biggest Loser contestant might just make others feel awkward though.

    If this offers any help, I'm going dressing as an "80's girl" this year. Very easy. Crimped hair, hideous eye shadow, leggings and ballet flats. All items that I already own.

    It's easy, it's funny, and I'm not restricted to a patent leather catwoman suit or a naughty nurse costume. Just some food for thought =)

  12. Princess Fiona for sure.. I got 1st prize for my costume..and I still have it all if you would like to borrow it... I had photos on my blog that I have closed.. do you remember it???
    I can send you photos later on if you would like to have a look... It did turn out well...
    just a thought..

  13. What about going as your favourite blogger... Marshmallow?

    Oi, don't listen to that fellow. He's crazy.

  14. I love getting dressed up. The good news is, that you CAN be sexy. I've got pics of me as a devil, in a bright red corset and short(ish) black skirt. It hold it all in, until breathing gets too hard... Umm.

    I've also done plenty of lion costumes. Wear beige, and lion ears. Stick some of that long strips of tinsel in your hair, and whack on a tail, and you're there!

    In fact, pretty much any animal costume can be done that way, wear regular clothes of a certain colour, use animal ears and a tail.


Awww thanks so much for the comment!