Read Day 3
Friday 9th November 2012
The pain and lack of sleep is catching up with me today and I am definitely feeling over being in hospital and I just want to go home. I just can't get comfortable at all and I wish I was in my own surroundings so I could relax a little more. I try to remind myself how luckyI am to have a lovely private room and it could be a lot worse, but nothing beats being at home.
The exciting part of today is that I am getting my IV and catheter out. I must admit that having a catheter was actually really good because it drains urine away immediately and I did not ever have to feel like I needed to go to the bathroom or use a bed pan (god forbid!). The IV was great too because, due to the swelling and fluid around my belly, I am so bloated that I find it difficult to get much water down so the IV has been keeping me hydrated.
After having the IV and the catheter out the nurse decides that I am finally ready to have a shower (no more sponge baths!). Unfortunately I had to shower in my compression garment because my surgeon has apparently just come back from a plastic surgery conference overseas and has heard that it is best to not remove the bindings at all for at least the first week. The nurses make it clear that they think this is ridiculous and have never heard such nonsense. I really don't care, I just don't want to get in the middle of their bickering!
As usual, there is no privacy (or dignity) in hospital and a nurse has to take me to shower and wash and dry me while I just sit there on one of those hospital showering chairs. As per the surgeon's instructions, I am showering in my garment, so the nurse attempts to wash off some of the fluid/blood stains to clean me up a bit. It is freezing after I get out because I am wearing a wet garment so the nurse wraps me in towels and hot blankets and I lay in bed to dry off.
AJ comes in to visit about lunch time today and I take advantage of his presence and being freshly clean and showered and get him to moisturise my feet. I don't feel like myself without all my beauty practices so it is so nice to have my feet feeling soft and smelling pretty again. it is these little things that cheer you up when you are sick!
I am also feeling more mobile today so I stand up and have AJ take some photos of me so I can get a better idea of what I look like. When I say 'stand up' I actually mean hunch over because my skin is pulled too tight to stand upright in any way! Try to ignore the pasty skin and greasy hair, I am not exactly looking my best! I have still severely swollen and bloated in these photo so I have lumps and bumps everywhere.
I am not even sure what to say about my sleep tonight. It was a horrendous night and for the first time ever I wished that I had not had the body lift surgery. I was struggling from the pain and discomfort today so I took the endone, despite being suspicious it was making me sick. I drifted off to sleep about 3.00am and woke myself up 15 minutes later after having a terrible night terror. I woke up shaking, sweating and feeling sick. I don't normally call the nurse unless it is urgent, but I was so shaken that I called her and asked for her help to go to the bathroom. Mostly I think I just wanted some company because I was so shaken.
I vowed not to let myself fall asleep again tonight in case the night terror came back, but unfortunately I drifted off again only 15 minutes later. This time the night terror was even worse and I woke up to two nurses rushing into my room because I was screaming and crying in my sleep. I had thrashed about so much that I knocked everything around me onto the floor and I was wet with sweat and tears. I was shaking like a leaf and my body hurt from the trashing about that it was not ready for so soon after major surgery.
This time I was definitely not letting myself fall asleep again and I was so traumatised that I barely closed my eyelids for the rest of the night. I contemplated calling AJ because I was still so scared and shakey but I knew there would be nothing he could do to help and it would just make him worry. So I just stared vacantly at the TV and focussed all of my energy on getting through the night.
Day 5 to come...