Tuesday, January 06, 2009

One Step At A Time

Like most people, I have decided to get fit and healthy as my New Years Resolution (same goal for the past twenty odd years). It is almost too painful for me to even talk about how bad I feel at the moment about my weight gain. It is impacting me a lot, both physically and mentally, and I just don't feel like myself at all.

So I decided that Monday (yesterday) was going to be the big day to get back on track and I was super excited to get the weight off and start feeling more like myself again. I was fine all day and it wasn't until I got home after work last night that I just felt so overwhelmed and reached for the box of Lindt chocolates and the Brie and crackers- all left over from Christmas of course. I felt overcome by being back at work at a job that drains every drop of happiness and positivity from me and the idea of preparing a healthy dinner and doing a workout was enough to make me cry.

So I ate until I felt uncomfortably full and then spent the night trying to work out why I do this to myself. Well I guess I know why, it is more a question of how to stop. People always say that you need to examine why you overeat, I have been examining this for the past ten years and I know why, but what next? For now I have decided to take small steps, today my goal is just to have a full day of healthy eating. I can eat as much as I need to feel full, as long as it is healthy, and there is no pressure to exercise. So far, so good...


  1. You know what I love about you ...??? We are almost identical!!
    So many of your posts are like you are writing for me or about my day!!
    Yesterday I had a faultless morning, afternoon and even dinner .... then I knew there was left over chocolate, then chips then custard!!! .... Then I sat there like a blimp and got all upset coz I wrecked another day!!
    But this morning, I got up and started again ..... and up until now, I am having a good day.
    Chin up chicken, it won't happen overnight ..... but we will do it!!

  2. Oh and we have to plan a weekend to meet up .... maybe a Melbourne bloggers meet has to be organised!!?? *hint hint*

  3. I remember reading somewhere that insight is the booby prize - that insight without change. Just think about the little things you can do that get you one step closer to your goals. That works for me because otherwise I get totally overwhelmed.

  4. if you guys have a melbourne blog meet you have to invite meeeeeeeee


  5. Have you thought about maybe going to a therapist?

  6. ONE step at a time! I think the first thing you need to do is stop beating yourself up over what happened last year. It's done, you can't change it but you can learn from it and it's the first step forward.

    I think so many of us (me included) can relate to what you're going through right now - time to put yourself first and make you happy. The job might be an entirely separate thing to focus on if it makes you so unhappy but for now change one small thing at a time (which you're doing) and before you know it you'll be feeling inspired to kick those kilos.

  7. I read that in order to achieve weight loss goals, we must stop hating ourselves when we look in the mirror, we need to be kind to ourselves in order to be good to ourselves, if you get what I mean, so therefore we need to start loving oneself, oh god that sounds rambling!!!! anyway good luck, one day at a time eh?

  8. Baby steps, hun :-)

    And I echo what FLG has said - he's an example of how therapy can really help, it's worked wonders for him and he is now steamrolling along!

    I also echo what Margaret said - you have to love yourself enough to want to help you; THAT is instrumental to self improvement in any facet.

  9. New to your blog. I too am on a journey to a healthier me. My goal this month is to track my food. I am not counting calories really, just writing down everything I eat. It helps a lot! I only eat a couple of spoonfuls of ice cream because I don't want to write down "1 carton".

  10. Baby steps! I'm here for you all the way :)

  11. I'm new to your blog and wanted to say hi.
    I hope you are feeling better today :)

    Here here to self love, know that you are so worth taking good gentle care of.
    Tell those negative thoughts to buggar off, no more self put downs.
    Everytime one creeps in replace it with something positive about yourself or your life.

    Vow to treat yourself with kindness, as you would to someone else that may be feeling the way you do. Become your own friend I guess and look out for yourself because you are truly worth it.

    Claire xxx

  12. I just realized that we r mega similar. I started last year at about your 2008 starting weight and now in 2009 we are starting at about the same weight too! Crazy! I will be here with you all the way!

  13. That sounds like a great goal. I think so often we want to start everything now but really it's better to focus on one aspect and get that under control before stepping up to the next challenge.

  14. That's a great goal for the day and you do sound really positive about it. Good luck!

    I too can't believe how similar your tale is to my own. I got to my lowest ever weight at the beginning of 2008 but ended the year having regained 30 kilos. I'm taking those very same baby steps again.

    All this time I'd avoided all the blogs I'd found so supportive many months ago because I dreaded reading about happy fit people when I was struggling so badly, but in reality we're so many of us going through the very same journey. I'm glad I came back, I'll be sure to pop by again, it's great to be able to have this network of people all there to support each other.

    p.s. I'd be up for that Melbourne meet n'all. I'm still pretty new to the city and don't know many folk.

  15. SNAP! I did exactly the same thing! But I have managed to turn it around and have had three good days now - and I know you can too. I think sometimes the pressure that we put on ourselves is the most detrimental. Hang in there Tully.
    Kel xx

  16. I think that it's great that everyone is so supportive of each other. The best thing I think is not to diet. Don't say you can't have anything but make a conscious effort to make the healthier choice. I have spent the last week doing that and I feel great and I don't feel deprived at all. The scales will tell all in the morning though aye??

  17. This is my first visit to your blog. This post made me feel your pain. I just want to tell you to hang in there. Take baby steps and link one good moment, meal, day to the next and a lot can happen that way.

    good luck in your jouney.


Awww thanks so much for the comment!