For the past couple of years I have been posting my weight on this blog on the 1st day of the month so as to keep a record of my weight loss (or gain) since having the lap band. Yesterday was the 1st of the month, but I won’t be posting a weigh in because I am not weighing myself right now. This isn’t because I’ve gained weight (though, I may well have) or because I am too obsessed with the scales and need a break or anything like that. I just don’t feel the need to get on the scales and see what I weigh.
I always knew that defining myself by the number on the scales was ridiculous, but I was never able to stop weighing myself… and then beating myself up because I gained weight or didn’t lose enough weight. Things have just clicked for me this month and I feel a calmness about not needing to get on the scale because it just doesn’t matter what the number says.
I have lived my whole life being obsessed with losing weight, and in doing so, I created a lot of bad habits. I have been on every diet and failed and then tried it again 6 months later… I have slogged it out at the gym and then not moved from the couch for weeks at a time... I have weighed myself and defined the way I feel about myself by the number on the scale… I don’t want this life anymore and I am slowly working toward finding the balance.
Lately I have been looking to my friends and family with healthy weights and healthy relationships with food and trying to learn from them. I have noticed that when I am with my friends and family that don’t have weight issues I am the only dull person that will obsess about weight, calories and exercise:
I am the one who will guiltily announce I have gained weight and they’ll look at me blankly and say they don’t even own a scale and wouldn’t have a clue if they have gained weight.
I am the only one that will sigh about needing to go to the gym the next day and they will make a comment about never having owned a gym membership.
I am the one who will mull over the healthy options on the menu and refuse any dessert while they enjoy the foods they want to eat.
For god’s sake, I wouldn’t want to be friends with me either!
This doesn’t mean I will never weigh myself again; I’ll just do it when I have an interest in seeing what I weigh. Right now, it's not of any importance or interest to me.
Thats a really positive step!
ReplyDeleteIm an obsessive weigher, and I really hope I get to that place where I can just not let my day be determined by a little digital number on a box.
I think I just need to get my head around the fact that being +1kg or -1kgs doesnt make me a better or worse person!
Oh yay for you!!! So exciting! and I agree, my thin, healthy friends have no idea what they weigh.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree that the number on the scale should not define you, but I also recognise that I need something more than 'how I'm feeling' to keep me accountable. The fit of my clothes only works for me to a limited extent because I tend to wear a lot of dresses anyway and I also know that I tend not to even try on certain clothes if I suspect I've gained weight (denial much?!?! ya huh)
ReplyDeletePlus, I now know that most of my friends don't own a scale, aren't a member of a gym, and can eat dessert without guilt because they're not trying to lose weight and never have! It sucks, but its true. But that's just me
I've got my fingers crossed for you!
I generally weigh myself 3 times a day. I keep hoping that after I sweat a little, a few kgs will have dropped off. It never really works. Lately my friends (and more importantly, my wife) have been telling me that I look great lately. Meanwhile, my scale keeps telling me that I'm the same. I've decided to start listening to my friends and family more, and my scale less. I hope it works out for both of us. I don't know if you're looking for other sites that really do a good job with nutrition and fitness, or if you will consider this stepping on toes. If I'm stepping on toes, sorry, you can just delete the comment, but if you're open to suggestions- my wife and I are really happy with the program we're using through http://www.reallifeforhealth.com. Their system is really easy to use and it does everything. They have 1000's of different recipes to choose from and they help you build a fitness and nutrition plan that suits your goals. Their exercises are all made by a certified personal trainer and come with printable workout cards and details of how the exercises are done. And for the nutrition part they even send you printable daily meal plans and menus, as well as printable daily or weekly grocery lists, which are broken down by the area of the grocery store or supermarket. My wife likes that all the recipes contain 12 ingredients or less, so they are easy enough for even me to cook. I like that there's no fad diets, pills, or required supplements. Again, if I'm not stepping on any toes, I suggest you check them out. They offer a free trial anyway, so there's harm in trying.
ReplyDelete