Thursday, May 28, 2009

Still On Liquids

I still can't get much down, yesterday I had a 200ml juice and half a cup of cream of chicken soup and I was so unbelievably (verging on sick) full. Today I woke up at 4.00am in pain and couldn't get back to sleep, so I had a lindt ball to cheer myself up. Technically chocolate is a liquid... Since then I have had half a glass of juice and the other half of my cup of soup from yesterday. I think I might be able to fit some more soup in for dinner tonight too. The weird thing is that I don't feel like I am losing weight at all, in fact I feel fat, heavy and bloated. I am staying away from the scales for a few more days until I start to feel a bit better.

So, I am not hungry to eat, yet I am obsessing over food. I am making poor AJ fat by giving him all my favourite comfort foods so I can fantasize while he eats them. A couple of days ago I made him a baked potato with coleslaw, cheese, bacon and sour cream and last night I made chicken burritos- and I don't normally cook! Tonight I am ordering Chinese food for him and my mum, just so I can be creepy and watch them eat it. OK, I am not quite that bad, but it is close.

All this lack of sleep and shoulder pain is making me super grumpy too. This morning I snapped at my mum because she told me I looked like I had lost weight and my top was loose on me and last time I wore it, it was much tighter. So she is trying to give me a compliment, yet I snap and tell her that is so mean to make me feel embarrassed that the last time I wore the top it was too small. Oh yeah, I am going a little crazy.

Despite all this, I am feeling strangely positive and excited about the changes ahead. I have spent a lot of time reading (stalking) the back files of lots of lap band blogs over the last couple of days and I can see there is lots of great times ahead.

9 comments:

  1. I wish you a quick recovery! Don't forget you've had major surgery so it's going to take time for you to feel 100% well.
    Good luck!

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  2. It does sound like a bit of adjusting at this stage - it may seem difficult now, but it will be worth it, I am sure.

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  3. Give yourself some time to get healed! I think you have a pass to be a bit of a pain in the a$$ since you just had surgery :)

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  4. Haha you sound just like me post surgery!!
    My flatmates still get to live out my 'food fantasys' lol They are also good to give things to that I can't finish. One of my flatmates even knows the look I get when something hasn't gone down right, he just looks at me and says 'bucket?'.

    My first night home from the hospital, I kept seeing ad's for pizza on TV. My mind was going crazy, all I could think about was ording a huge pizza, getting KFC, Mcd's and whatever else I could get my hands on.....It took me about 3/4 of an hour to drink a small cup of anything at this stage lol. The good thing is that this stage does pass.
    Hope you start to feel more like yourself soon. :)

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  5. Hope you feel better soon. It's all very exciting!

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  6. You made me LOL with the "creepy & watch them eat it". Too funny.

    Give yourself a little more time to heal. Glad you are feeling positive, as well as a bit cranky!

    Have a good weekend.

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  7. It must be so exciting to be through the hard times and know that good things are going to happen from now on!

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  8. i am nearly around the bend that i'm finally meeting you tomorrow!

    you may order whatever you want off the menu for me, if that is helpful.

    i also have no intention of reducing you to nothing more than a person with a weight issue. there is plenty more for us to yap about, though i'm fairly confident the topics of body image, diets and scale weight are going to feature in there somewhere.

    just know that when i think of you, i don't think of 'weight'. i just think 'what a cool chick'.

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  9. Good call at not getting on the scale. I got on the scale 3 days after surgery and it said I gained 10lbs. I was filled with fluid and gas. It jumped down after I gave myself a couple of weeks.

    There are good days and difficult days ahead. The good days far outweigh the difficult ones! Go Girl!

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Awww thanks so much for the comment!