Last week: 86.9 kilos (191 lbs)
Today: 86.2 kilos (189.5 lbs)
Difference: - .7 kilos (1.5 lbs)
Total: -1.3 kilos (2.5 lbs)
It's time for my weekly weigh in for my Final 15 challenge and the results are mixed. I did lose 0.7 kilo this week, but I did not do it the right way...
Last week I talked about how I had a gain after a weekend of terrible eating and bingeing. I had really hoped that I could do better this week, but I somehow managed to do worse. I did not even think it was possible to do worse, but I guess I am kind of like a superhero of terrible eating and I surprised even myself.
I won't get into the nitty gritty of what went wrong because there is no real reason for why I started to eat and couldn't stop. I don't know why I keep eating until I am physically ill and can't even sleep because of the pain in my stomach. It just seems so crazy to me that I can want to lose weight so much and have every reason in the world to suceed and yet I keep failing. It is such a shameful process to keep going through.
After 4 days of binge eating I woke up on Tuesday morning and just knew something had to change. I took the drastic step of resorting to protein shakes for breakfast and lunch for the rest of the week (with normal dinners). I just felt like my body needed a reprieve from food and drinking the shakes didn't feel like a punishment, it felt refreshing.
So by doing the shakes I managed to turn my week around and actually lose 0.7 kilos instead of gaining about 3 kilos. Thank god. I obviously don't want to have to continue on this binge and starve cycle because it is not good for my body so I am
This is me today as I write this at work at 86.2 kilos. It'll be at least another 6 kilos until I start to lose the bloat in my face and fit into any of my clothes again but I am determined to get these Final 15 kilos off.